What’s your secret to being happy?
For the past couple of months I have been struggling with my tween boy’s emotions. So much so we have been going to a behavioral therapist. I wanted my boy to have tools to use when his emotions got the better of him. I want him to be happy.
Am I Happy?
This got me to thinking, what defines being happy? How is it measured? I asked myself if I was happy. I looked at all parts of my life at the present time. Was I loved? Did I have my basic needs met(food, and shelter)? Was I happy with where I was in life? Was my stress level higher than I could handle? By answering all these questions of myself I came to the conclusion i was happy because I was grateful for all of it. The good the bad and the ugly. I own them love them and I am happy to have lived through them.
Who else is happy?
So now I know I am happy. But what makes other people happy? I really wanted to know. My aunt has a theory that it is partly genetic. The fact being, for the most part our immediate family we are happy people. I am leaning towards the idea we were given the tools to cope with life while growing up.
So I decided to Googled it. I one found an article the author stated it was passion. She fought for it, risked everything, cried, beat herself up, doubted herself, failed, re-routed plans time and again, felt crazy, and then finally felt alive and began living passionately.
Then my next step was to see what I could find on YouTube. I found this talk by psychiatrist Robert Waldinger. He has been part of a 75 year old study of men in the Boston area. The findings are very interesting. In a nutshell they found that the quality of close relationships made these men happier well into their 80’s. I buy that! I have to say since I married my husband I am generally a happier person than I was when I was in my twenties and thirties.
Define Being Happy
All of this gave me a good perspective on what other people are thinking being happy is. I have come to the conclusion, happiness like love has it’s own personal definition. It is different for everyone. Yes, we all can come to common definitions, conclusions, and even scientific ones. But it is a person’s own experiences that make up the definition of being happy.
My own personal definition is being grateful. The fact that I recognize gratitude is what keeps me feeling blessed, and happy.
What is your happiness? I would love to hear about what makes you happy. Please feel free to leave me a comment.
Thanks for stopping by.